21 Important Advice

ONE. Give people more than they expect and do it cheerfully.

TWO. Marry a man/woman you love to talk to. As you get older,
their conversational skills will be as important as any other.

THREE. Don't believe all you hear, spend all
you have or sleep all you want.

FOUR. When you say, 'I love you,' mean it.

FIVE. When you say, 'I'm sorry,' look the person in the eye.

SIX. Be engaged at least six months before you get married.

SEVEN. Believe in love at first sight.

EIGHT. Never laugh at anyone's dreams.
People who don't have dreams don't have much.

NINE. Love deeply and passionately. You might get hurt
but it's the only way to live life completely.

TEN. In disagreements, fight fairly. No name calling.

ELEVEN. Don't judge people by their relatives.

TWELVE. Talk slowly but think quickly.

THIRTEEN! . When someone asks you a question you don't
want to answer, smile and ask, 'Why do you want to know?'

FOURTEEN. Remember that great love and
great achievements involve great risk.

FIFTEEN. Say 'bless you' when you hear someone sneeze.

SIXTEEN. When you lose, don't lose the lesson.

SEVENTEEN. Remember the three R's: Respect for self;
Respect for others; and Responsibility for all your actions.

EIGHTEEN. Don't let a little dispute injure a great friendship.

NINETEEN. When you realize you've made a mistake,
take immediate steps to correct it.

TWENTY. Smile when picking up the phone.
The caller will hear it in your voice.

TWENTY- ONE. Spend some time alone.

A true friend is someone who reaches for your
hand and touches your heart.

Never Alone !!!

I never liked being alone. It was too quiet, disconcerting. Ever since I was a little girl, I felt uncomfortable on my own. Even as an adult I found it distressing.

One day my son was off at a friend’s house, my daughter was away at her first year of college, and worst of all, my husband, Mike, was in the hospital. I was worried, and alone.

It was a minor surgical procedure. Laparoscopic. Nothing serious. He seemed to come through it fine and would be home the next day. One more day, I thought while getting ready for bed.

I wished my mother could be with me, but she lived hundreds of miles away, and Mike’s folks were away at their summer place. It was vacation time, and all my friends were out of town. I stared at the shadowy wall all night, unable to sleep, feeling the emptiness beside me.

First thing in the morning I took a taxi to the hospital. “How’s. . . everything . . . at . . . home?” Mike asked, his voice weak and labored. I took his hand; his skin was cold and clammy. His eyes were wide. Something was wrong.

A nurse with a cheery smile popped into the room. As she bent over Mike to take his vital signs, her smile disappeared. Before I knew it, the room was full of worried doctors and nurses. I was pushed back away from his bedside, against the cold cement block wall. “Pulse is rapid.” “Blood pressure elevated,” I heard the nurses say. What was going on?

Suddenly Mike was whisked out of the room. One of the nurses noticed me standing alone by the wall, my knees shaking. “Your husband is having trouble breathing. We’re taking him for an MRI. We think he has blood clots in his lungs.” She looked into my eyes. “I’m sorry.” I’m sorry! That’s not what I wanted to hear. What about “Everything’s going to be fine?” or “It’s nothing serious!” Blood clots in the lungs? That was serious!

I stepped into the hall and stared. What did I do? Where was the waiting room? I didn’t even know which way to go.

“You should go to the ICU waiting room,” a nurse said, noticing my confusion. “Second floor.”

I went there and sat with other quiet, anxious strangers. I spotted a phone on the wall, and I fished for quarters in my pocketbook. The first call was to Mike’s parents. They’d come home right away, but it would take a while. I called my mother, wishing she wasn’t so far away. Then I called my daughter, Kate. I didn’t want to worry her. But she’d always been a rock for me. It helped a little just to hear her voice. When I hung up, however, I choked back the tears.

I started to put away my pocketbook, but I had one last call to make. I dialed the number of my church. An answering machine picked up my call. Should I leave a message? What should I say? We hadn’t been attending long so I didn’t know many people. Finally I just said that Mike was in the hospital and had taken a turn for the worse. Maybe they could say some prayers.

It seemed like forever sitting and wondering. I put my head in my hands and tried to hide my tears. Suddenly, a woman walked in and approached me.

“Peggy?” she asked, kneeling beside me. “I’m Lisa. I’m a social worker here at the hospital, and I also go to your church. I got a call from the pastor that you were here, so I ducked over to see if you were okay.”

I looked up, surprised. She seemed so calm and gentle. Seemingly out of the blue, someone had found me and offered help. I wiped the tears from my cheek.

“If you need anything, ask someone to page me. Okay?” She put her hand on my shoulder and smiled comfortingly.

“Yes, thank you so much,” I sniffed. Before long, I was allowed in to see Mike. He was hooked up to monitors, IVs, and was wearing an oxygen mask, but I was so happy to be with him again. “You’re going to be fine,” I said, stroking his arm. I hoped. I looked to the doctor at his bedside.

“There are multiple clots in both lungs,” he said. “He’s on heparin and coumadin; blood thinners. The next few days are very important.”

I understood. Hopefully the blood clots would break up and dissolve. But if they didn’t, or if they traveled to the brain, the results could be fatal. Blood clots were serious business. The doctor left, and Mike dozed off. I sat by his side, aching for something I could do to help him. I put my head against his hand and cried. Then it was time to leave for the evening. I returned home alone.

But as I sat there in my quiet house, eating my dinner, the phone started ringing. First, a woman from our church called; she identified herself as Sue and offered to give me rides back and forth to the hospital. She even insisted on driving three hours each way to pick up Kate at college and bring her home for the weekend. Then someone else called and said she’d stop by with a meal. I didn’t even know these people! Finally, just before I went to bed, the phone rang again. It was my mom.

“I was trying to arrange to take a bus tomorrow,” she said. “But my friend said, ‘No way!’ She’s going to drive me there right now. We’ll get in about 2 am.”

“She’ll drive all that way in the middle of the night?” I asked, unbelieving.

“Yup. I’ll see you soon. Just hang in there.”

I did, thanks to the support of Lisa, Sue, and others I barely knew. Mike recovered, came home, and gradually grew stronger. And I was stronger, too. With good, caring people everywhere, ready to lend a hand, I am never really alone.

8 Gifts That Do Not Cost a Cent

1. THE GIFT OF LISTENING...
But you must REALLY listen. No interrupting, no daydreaming,
no planning your response. Just listening.

2. THE GIFT OF AFFECTION...
Be generous with appropriate hugs, kisses, pats on the back and holds. Let these small actions demonstrate the love you have for family and friends.

3. THE GIFT OF LAUGHTER...
Clip cartoons. Share articles and funny stories.
Your gift will say, "I love to laugh with you."

4. THE GIFT OF A WRITTEN NOTE...
It can be a simple "Thanks for the help" note or a full sonnet.
A brief, handwritten note may be remembered for a lifetime, and may
even change a life.

5. THE GIFT OF A COMPLIMENT.. .
A simple and sincere, "You look great in red",
"You did a super job" or "That was a wonderful meal" can make
someone's day.

6. THE GIFT OF A FAVOR...
Every day, go out of your way to do something kind.

7. THE GIFT OF SOLITUDE...
There are times when we want nothing better than to be left alone.
Be sensitive to those times and give the gift of solitude to others.

8. THE GIFT OF A CHEERFUL DISPOSITION. ..
The easiest way to feel good is to extend a kind word to someone,
really it's not that hard to say, Hello or Thank You.

Accomplish Your Goals Using Daily Task Lists

I didn't always plan my days. For most of my career, in fact, I didn't.

I had written goals. And I referred to them regularly. My goals kept me pointed in the right direction, but I was always moving back and forth. Often for no good reason.

Driving to work in the morning, I would think about my goals. That helped motivate me and often gave me specific ideas about what tasks I should accomplish that day. I'd walk into work meaning to complete those tasks… but by the end of the day, many of them were not done.

What happened? The same thing that may be happening to you right now. You sit down at your desk, and there is a pile of new mail in your inbox. You pick up the phone, and 15 messages are waiting for you. You open your computer, and find that you've received 50 new e-mails since you last checked. You tell yourself that you will get to your important tasks later. Right now, you have to "clean up" all these little emergencies.

Before you know it, the day is over and you haven't taken a single step toward achieving your important goals. You make an effort to do something, but you are tired. Tomorrow, you tell yourself, you will do better.

Does that sound familiar?

If so, don't feel bad. You are in good company. Most people deal with their work that way. Even people who set goals and achieve them. Over the long term, they get everything done. But on a day-to-day basis, they are constantly frustrated.

You can be successful without planning your days… but you will have to work a lot longer and harder. The reason? When you don't plan your days, you end up working for other people - not just for yourself. You feel that before you get to your own work, you should first deal with their requests.

Starting your day by clearing out your inbox, voicemail inbox, and e-mail inbox is just plain dumb. Most of what is waiting for you every morning has nothing to do with your goals and aspirations. It is work that other people want you to do for them.

If you want to be the captain of your soul and the master of your future, you have to be in charge of your time. And the best way to be in charge of your time is to structure your day around a task list that you, and only you, create.

As I said, simply writing down my goals helped me accomplish a good deal. But my productivity quadrupled when I started managing my schedule with a daily task list. If you use the system I'm going to recommend, I'll bet you see the same improvement.

I have used many standard organizing systems over the years, but was never entirely satisfied with any of them. The system I use now is my own - based on the best of what I found elsewhere.

At the beginning of the year, I lay out my goals for the next 12 months. I ask myself "What do I need to achieve in January, February, etc. to keep myself on track?" Then, at the beginning of each month, I lay out my weekly objectives. Finally, every day, I create a very specific daily task list.

Here's how I do it…

My Personal Daily Task List

I begin each day the day before.

What I mean by that is that I create my daily task list at the end of the prior day. I create Tuesday's task list at the end of Monday's workday. I create Wednesday's at the end of Tuesday's workday.

I begin by reviewing the current day's list. I note which tasks I've done and which I have failed to do. My new list - the next day's task list - begins with those uncompleted tasks. I then look at my weekly objectives to see if there are any other tasks that I want to add. Then I look through my inbox and decide what to do with what's there. I may schedule some of those items for the following day. Most of them, I schedule for later or trash or redirect to someone else.

I do all this in pen on a 6" x 9" pad of lined paper. I divide the paper vertically to create columns for the tasks, for the time I estimate it will take to do each one, and for the actual time it takes me to complete it. I also create a column for tasks I will delegate to my assistant.

On most days, I end up with about 20 15-minute to one-hour tasks.

I like doing this by hand, in pen and ink. You may prefer to do it on your computer. The point is to enjoy the process.

Because longer tasks tend to be fatiguing, I seldom schedule anything that will take more than an hour. If you have a task that will take several hours, break it up into pieces and do it over a few days. It will be easier to accomplish. Plus, you will probably do a better job because you'll be doing it with more energy and with time to review and revise your work as you go.

A typical day for me includes two or three one-hour tasks, three or four half-hour tasks, and a dozen or so 15-minute tasks. The kind of work you do may be different, but I like that balance. It gives me flexibility. I can match my energy level throughout the day to my task list.

Ideally, you should get all of your important tasks and most of your less important tasks done almost every day. You want to accomplish a lot so you can achieve your long-term goals as quickly as possible. But you also want to feel good about yourself at the end of the day.

You may find, as I did, that when you begin using this system you will be overzealous - scheduling more tasks than you can possibly handle. So set realistic time estimates when you write down your tasks. And double-check them at the end of the day by filling in the actual time you spent on each one.

When you complete a task, scratch it off your list. One task done! On to the next one! I've been doing this for years, and I still get a little burst of pleasure every time.

Creating each daily task list should take you less than 15 minutes. The secret is to work from your weekly objectives - which are based on your monthly and yearly goals.

This system may not work for you, but I urge you to give it a try. I think you'll like it.

Before your colleagues, competitors, and coworkers are even sipping their first cup of coffee, you'll have figured out everything you need to do that day to make you healthier, wealthier, and wiser. You will know what to do, you will know what your priorities are, and you will already be thinking about some of them. You will not have to worry about forgetting something important. And you will have a strong sense of energy and excitement, confident that your day is going to be a productive one.

By Michael Masterson

Always Think Big

One of the secrets to wealth is to THINK BIG! The fact is that very few people “think” big and even fewer “play” big. So why don't people want to “play big”? Usually, it’s because they believe they can't handle “big” or they don't want to handle it. Why? Because “big” often equals big responsibilities, big hassles and big problems.

One of the biggest differences between rich people and poor people is that highly successful people are bigger than their problems while unsuccessful people are smaller than their problems.

Unsuccessful people are constantly trying to avoid problems. They back away from challenges. The irony is that in their quest to make sure they don't have problems, they have the biggest problem of all... they're broke or close to it. The secret to success is not to try and shrink your problems; it's to grow yourself so you're bigger than any problem.

Imagine a “level 2” person is looking at a “level 5” problem. Does this problem appear to be big or small? The answer is that from a “level 2” perspective, a “level 5” problem would seem BIG.

Now imagine a “level 8” person looking at this same “level 5” problem. From this person’s perspective, is this problem big or small? Magically, the identical problem is now a SMALL problem.

And for a “level 10” person, it’s NO problem at all. It’s just an everyday occurrence, like brushing your teeth.

It’s important to realize that whether you are rich or poor, playing big or playing small, problems do not go away. If you're breathing, you will always have situations that aren’t perfect.

Therefore, the size of the problem is never the problem. It’s always the size of you!

The secret then is to grow yourself as a person, to be bigger than your problems so that they become insignificant and appear to disappear. Not because the problems are not there, but because you handle them so easily.

The bigger problems you can handle; the bigger business you can handle, the bigger responsibilities you can handle, the more customers you can handle and the more money and wealth you can handle.

Remember, your income can only grow to the extent that you do!

A universal principle states that “at all points in time you are either growing or dying”. That’s why it is essential to keep learning and continue to work on yourself.

This month commit to growing yourself.

This month, do not shrink from problems, do not avoid problems and do not complain about problems. Practice not letting problems bother you. In fact, don’t even call them problems; refer to them as “challenges” or “situations”.

This month, practice handling problems with elegance and ease. The way to do this is to let go of your attachments, as well as the emotion and drama you create when you don’t get what you want. Just stay present and handle one situation at a time with an open mind and an open heart. Trust yourself and trust the universe that everything will work out in the end.

The bottom line is that if you become a master at handling problems, what can stop you from happiness and wealth? The answer is NOTHING!

Daily Declaration:

I am bigger than any problems.

I can handle any problems.

Nothing will stop me from getting rich.

I have a millionaire mind!

Your Challenges Keep You Energized.

The Japanese have always loved fresh fish. But the water close to Japan has not held many fish for decades. So to feed the Japanese population, fishing boats got bigger and went farther than ever. The farther the fishermen went, the longer it took to bring the fish. If the return trip took more time, the fish were not fresh.

To solve this problem, fish companies installed freezers on their boats. They would catch the fish and freeze them at sea. Freezers allowed the boats to go farther and stay longer.

However, the Japanese could taste the difference between fresh and frozen fish. And they did not like the taste of frozen fish. The frozen fish brought a lower price. So, fishing companies installed fish tanks. They would catch the fish and stuff them in the tanks, fin to fin. After a little thrashing around, they were tired, dull, and lost their fresh-fish taste. The fishing industry faced an impending crisis! But today, they get fresh-tasting fish to Japan . How did they manage? To keep the fish tasting fresh, the Japanese fishing companies still put the fish in the tanks but with a small shark. The fish are challenged and hence are constantly on the move. The challenge they face keeps them alive and fresh!

Have you realized that some of us are also living in a pond but most of the time tired and dull? Basically in our lives, sharks are new challenges to keep us active. If you are steadily conquering challenges, you are happy.

"Your challenges keep you energized. Don't create success and revel in it in a state of inertia. You have the resources, skills and abilities to make a difference. Put a shark in your tank and see how far you can really go..!

Things Are Not Always Black or White

Many times, we tend to argue over isues with our fellow colleagues, spouses, parents, members & etc. We failed to realise that we're merely stressing our views which could be right for us but wrong to others, in the heat of the arguement. We need to establish greater sense of understanding & maturity, which could could help us to form a meaningful & better relationship.
In life, a lesson learned in your past that you will never forget completely.

When I was in primary school, I got into a major argument with a boy in my class. I have forgotten what the argument was about, but I have never forgotten the lesson learned that day.

I was convinced that I was right and he was wrong - and he was just as convinced that I was wrong and he was right. The teacher decided to teach us a very important lesson. She brought us up to the front of the class and placed him on one side of her desk and me on the other.

In the middle of her desk was a large, round object. I could clearly see that it was black. She asked the boy what color the object was. White, he answered.

I couldn't believe he said the object was white, when it was obviously black! Another argument started between my classmate and me, this time about the color of the object.

The teacher told me to go stand where the boy was standing and told him to come stand where I had been. We changed places, and now she asked me what the color of the object was. I had to answer, White. It was an object with two differently colored sides, and from his viewpoint it was white. Only from my side was it black.

My teacher taught me a very important lesson learned that day You must stand in the other person's shoes and look at the situation through their eyes in order to truly understand their perspective.