Friday, May 26, 2006

What Came First? It 's Egg say British Experts.

London: It’s an age-old debate: What came first, the chicken or the egg? A British scientist says it was the egg. And he has the backing of a philosopher and a chicken farmer.
 
According to the scientist, Prof. John Brookfield, a specialist in evolutionary genetics at the University of Nottingham, it’s very simple. The bird, which has now evolved into a chicken, would have first existed as an embryo inside the egg during pre-historic times.
 
"Therefore, the first living thing which we could say unequivocally was a member of the species would be this first egg," he was quoted across British dailies. "So, I would conclude that the egg came first."
 
Brookfield’s views have been endorsed by Prof David Papineau of King's College London, and Charles Bourns, a poultry farmer and the chairman of a trade body called Great British Chicken. Papineau, whose subject is the philosophy of science, have also reached the conclusion that the first chicken came from an egg and that proves there were chicken eggs before chickens. Papineau says that those argue that the mutant egg belonged to the "non-chicken" parents, are mistaken.
 
"I would argue that it is a chicken egg if it has a chicken in it," he was quoted as saying. "If a kangaroo laid an egg from which an ostrich hatched, that would surely be an ostrich egg, not a kangaroo egg."
 
The poultry farmer Bourns also belongs to the eggs’ side. "Eggs were around long before the first chicken arrived," he stated.

Thursday, May 18, 2006

Funny Divorce Letter :-)

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Dear Husband

I'm writing you this letter to tell you that I'm leaving you for good. I've been a good woman to you for seven years and I have nothing to show for it. These last two weeks have been hell. Your boss called to tell me that you had quit your job today and that was the last straw. Last week, you came home and didn't notice that I had gotten my hair and nails done, cooked your favorite meal and even wore a brand new negligee. You came home and ate in two minutes, and went straight to sleep after watching the game. You don't tell me you love me anymore, you don't touch me or anything Either you're cheating or you don't love me anymore, whatever the case is, I'm gone.


P.S. If you're trying to find me, don't. Your BROTHER and I are moving away to West Virginia together! Have a great life!

Your Ex-wife

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Dear Ex-Wife

Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter. It's true that you and I have been married for seven years, although a good woman is a far cry from what you've been. I watch sports so much to try to drown out
your constant nagging. Too bad that doesn't work. I did notice when you cut off all of your hair last week, the first thing that came to mind was "You look just like a man!" My mother raised me to not say anything if
you can't say anything nice. When you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY BROTHER, because I stopped eating pork seven years ago. I went to sleep on you when you had on that new negligee because the price tag was still on it. I prayed that it was a coincidence that my brother had just borrowed fifty dollars from me that morning and your negligee was $49.99. After all of this, I still loved you and felt that we could work it out. So when I discovered that I had hit the lotto for ten million dollars, I quit my job and bought us two tickets to Jamaica . But when I got home you were gone. Everything happens for a reason I guess. I hope you have the fulfilling life you always wanted. My lawyer said with your letter that you wrote, you won't get a dime from me. So take care.

P.S. I don't know if I ever told you this but Carl, my brother was born Carla. I hope that's not a problem.

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Wednesday, May 10, 2006

LOVE IS BLIND (Explained) - Worth Reading...!!!

A long time ago, before the world was created and humans set foot on it, God had put all the human "qualities" in a separate room. Since all the qualities were bored they decided to play hide & seek. "Madness" was one of the qualities and he shouted: "I want to count, I want to count!"
 
And since nobody was crazy enough to want to seek "Madness", all the other qualities agreed. So "Madness" leaned against a tree and started to count:
 
"One, two, and three..." As "Madness" counted, the qualities went hiding. "Treason" hid in a pile of garbage... "Lie" said that it would hide under a stone, but hid at the bottom of the lake. And Madness continued to count"... seventy nine, eighty, eighty one..."
 
By this time, all the qualities were already hidden-except "Love". For stupid as "Love" is, he could not decide where to hide. And this should not surprise us, because we all know how difficult it is to hide "Love".
 
"Madness": "...ninety five, ninety six, ninety seven..." Just when "Madness" got to one hundred........."Love" jumped into a rose bush where he hid.
 
And Madness turned around and shouted: "I'm coming, I’m coming!" As Madness turned around, "Laziness" was the first to be found, because "Laziness" was too lazy to hide. "Madness" searched madly and found "Lie" at the bottom of the lake. One by one, Madness found them all except Love. Madness was getting desperate, unable to find Love.
 
Envious of Love, "Envy" whispered to "Madness" - "You only need to find Love, and Love is hiding in the rose bush."
 
"Madness" Jumped on the rose bush and he heard loud cry. The thorns in the bush had pierced "Loves" eyes.
 
Hearing the commotion God came into the room and saw what had happened. He got very angry and cursed "Madness" and said since "Love" has become blind because of you...You shall always be with him". And so it came about that from that day on...
 
Love is Blind and is always accompanied by Madness.

Monday, May 08, 2006

Believe in 6 Things - Positive Attitude Quote.

There is a place in the HEART
where THOUGHTS become WISHES

and WISHES become DREAMS.

It's a place where anything is possible

if we only BELIEVE.

There are 6 things to believe in

for a happy, successful life:

Believe in your FAITH...

Believe in your LOVE...
Believe in your GOALS...

Believe in your FAMILY...

Believe in your FRIENDS...

And most importantly,

Believe in YOURSELF!

If you believe in these 6 things

You can't go wrong.

Have a wonderful day!!

Thursday, April 27, 2006

Funny Humor Joke...!!!

Why must we put on our pants one leg at a time?
 
If we jumped into our pants simultaneously placing both legs in at one time, we would land heavily on the ground. As a majority of us are getting dressed at the same time of the morning, the cumulative effect would Cause an earth tremor. Due to the use of time zones, the tremor established In Eastern Time would arrive in the central zone at precisely the moment all those people were jumping into their pants. The tremor would increase in size exponentially, and proceed west to combine with the mountain zone folks as they get dressed. As this cycle encircles the globe, it would feed upon the next day's Tremor and eventually cause the earth's crust to break apart and float into space. This is why we put our pants on one leg at a time.

Monday, April 24, 2006

Positive Attitude - Sharpening Our Skills from Time to Time is the Key to Success.

Once upon a time a very strong woodcutter asked for a job with a timber merchant, and he got it. His salary was really good and so were the working conditions. For that reason, the woodcutter was determined to do his best.
 
His boss gave him an axe and showed him the area where he was supposed to fell the trees. The first day, the woodcutter brought down 15 trees. "Congratulations," the boss said. "Carry on with your work!" Highly motivated by the words of his boss, the woodcutter tried harder the next day, but he only could bring 10 trees down. The third day he tried even harder, but he was only able to bring down 7 trees. Day after day he was bringing lesser number of trees down.
 
"I must be losing my strength", the woodcutter thought. He went to the boss and apologized, saying that he could not understand what was going on. "When was the last time you sharpened your axe?" the boss asked. "Sharpen? I had no time to sharpen my axe. I have been very busy trying to cut trees..."
 
That's right. Most of us NEVER update our skills. We think that whatever we have learned is very much enough. But good is not good when better is expected. Sharpening our skills from time to time is the key to success.

Friday, April 21, 2006

Funny Leave Letters by Various Companies...!!!

This is a collection of leave letters and applications written by people...

1. An employee applied for leave as follows:

Since I have to go to my village to sell my land along with my wife,
please sanction me one-week leave.

2. From an employee who was performing the "mundane" ceremony of his 10 year old son:

"as I want to shave my son's head, please leave me for two days.."

3. Leave-letter from an employee who was performing his daughter's wedding:

"as I am marrying my daughter, please grant a week's leave.."

4. From H.A.L. Administration dept:

"As my mother-in-law has expired and I am only one responsible for it, please grant me 10 days leave."

5. Another employee applied for half day leave as follows:

"Since I've to go to the cremation ground at 10 o-clock and I may not return, please grant me half day casual leave"

6. An incident of a leave letter

"I am suffering from fever, please declare one day holiday."

7. A leave letter to the headmaster:

"As I am studying in this school I am suffering from headache. I request you to leave me today"

8. Another leave letter written to the headmaster:

"As my headache is paining, please grant me leave for the day."

9. Covering note:

"I am enclosed herewith..."

10. Another one:

"Dear Sir: with reference to the above, please refer to my below..."

11. Actual letter written for application of leave:

"My wife is suffering from sickness and as I am her only husband at home I may be granted leave".

12. Letter writing: -

"I am in well here and hope you are also in the same well."

13. A candidate's job application:

"This has reference to your advertisement calling for a ' Typist and an Accountant - Male or Female'... As I am both (!! )for the past several years and I can handle both with good experience, I am applying for the post.